Choreographing Ease and Flow

The chortlings of migrating starlings descending on the feeders outside my windows this morning seemed to herald the approach of warmer days. Watching the small flocks’ aerial dances led me to search the internet and find this clip of huge flocks in Scotland . It  seems to fit well with my morning musings on  “ease” and “flow”, the words I’ve chosen for as my themes for this year.

How amazing to watch these synchronized movements and discover that the filmmaker who recorded their aerial feats again and again never once saw a collision among them.  Could there be a more compelling visual demonstration of ease and flow?

As artists, we don’t ever attain a blissful, creative state minus any self-doubt or anxiety, but rather learn to trust in our own inner navigator to get us back on course when we flounder, and realign us with our own inner compass.

We just keep at it.

I’m reading Martha Graham’s autobiography, a treatise in focus, dedication, passion. On the first page of the book she writes, “To practice means to perform, in the face of all obstacles, some act of vision, of faith, of desire. Practice is a means of inviting the perfection desired.”

“First comes the study and practice of the craft which is the school where you are working in order to strengthen the muscular structure of the body…The body is shaped, disciplined, honored

and in time, trusted…

Then comes the cultivation of the being from which whatever you have to say comes. It doesn’t just come from out of nowhere, it comes out of a great curiosity. The main thing, of course, always is the fact

that there is only one of you in the world, just one, and if that is not fulfilled then something has been lost.”

Currents of Choices

Another full moon on Saturday night – it is now officially Spring.

This past week my creative river has been flowing along briskly – no ice jams here! Choices and  ideas keep growing and multiplying. Some get ruled out, others lead to new insights and options. I visualize and affirm “clarity” a lot!

In Eric Merisel's “Overcoming Creative Anxiety” course through Daily OM, he writes about creative choice-making:

Choosing provokes anxiety. Even such small matters as choosing which cereal to bring home or which television show to watch can cause a little tendril of anxiety. How much more anxiety is generated by trying to choose between spending two years on this novel or on that novel! Even more significantly, every single mark you make as a painter or word you put on the page as a writer is a choice: when you create you are constantly choosing, which means that a certain amount of anxiety is likely always to be with you as you create.

What reassuring words. We all feel tension when we create, whether we are painters, writers or wood carvers. But working through ideas and addressing the problems and surprises they bring is the heart and soul of studio work. Would you ever trade this for any other life?  I wouldn’t.

I've been making lots of painted papers for my “fluttering pages” and laying them out to see what they will look like in combination. Since the three panels will hang together as a triptych, developing quantities of papers with variety in for color, texture, pattern and values are an important first step in the design process.

 It took careful measuring, checking and rechecking every step of the way to complete this new work, but my desire was to mount and complete it for this blog post. While the idea for this started out to be rolled tubes, the substrate turned out so beautiful that I formed half cylinders from these and mounted them on the stretched canvas.

One of the original tube samples – this one has knotted strips.

  

My intention in twisting and manipulating the cut strips on the openings is to suggest lines of writing across the surface. I may paint the edges of the strips to accentuate them and make them more visible.

Here’s an informal shot of the completed work. The glare from the flash makes it difficult to see the details, but it does give you the feel of the piece. It’s Atta-Girl time; so satisfying to see a new idea launched, with new variations already standing in line waiting for their turn to be realized.

Flux: Hungerford Artists Participate in “Thaw”

Over 20 artists that rent studios in the Hungerford Building, 1115 East Main Street, Rochester, NY, mounted “Flux”,  a joint exhibition of their works as part of Thaw, a regional, multi-gallery event.  Just like the artists in the building, the show is an eclectic mix of styles and mediums that works well together and definitely speaks to the talent that this converted old fruit syrup factory now houses.

The opening reception was Friday, March 4. The exhibit will be open to the public every Saturday this month, 11 AM – 3 PM. I got to take some pictures of the works yesterday during my shift there.

  Entering and looking to the left in the space. It is a large, rectangular  industrial space with a bank of windows along the back wall that really allowed both two and three dimensional works to be presented well.

John Wilson and Dory Driss's  junk sculptures always are a feast for the imagination. John, a retired lawyer, told up welding about four years ago. The larger bird is his design, the smaller one, “Senator Byrd”, is Dory’s'. John fabricates Dorys’ designs as well as his own.

Hodaka Hasabee’s large sculptural ceramic vase looks lovely next to my work.

 

Sculptor Victor Pacheco is my neighbor across the hall and this poisonous frog is an exceptional example of his work. The surface looks like riveted sheets of fabricated metal although it is fabricated from resin-coated Styrofoam.

The shots above and below show the other side of the gallery. This shot was taken from the back of the space, looking toward the front entry. 

A close-up of the beautiful collaborative vessel by ceramicist Richard Aerni and ceramic sculptor Carolyn Dilcher - Stutz.

  Sculptor Bill Wolff’s work on the center pedestals. His studio is down the hall from mine. A   close up of the small mixed media pieces and painted table top by Betsy Hoefen.  Her son Bret has an inspiring blog about dealing with a rare form of cancer, called “Ride in a Good Direction”.

Rollin’ on the River

I have been shakin’ it up like Tina on the stage of life this week. I had a private coaching session with Leslie on Friday after the fifth “Finding Your Authentic Voice” class to deal with some longstanding fears about putting my work out in the world.

Coaches ask perceptive questions and offer “assignments”; Leslie suggested several this week.

I’ve got a tiger by the tail again with the studio work and my days are filled with both joy and creative anxiety. Every day has been a studio day. I’m learning more about deep breathing and releasing to help clear the anxiety and also to help calm the joy and direct it into my work. The anxiety comes from all the stages of new work unfolding and the risks that engaging in creating bring (and always will, I now recognize, so I will keep gathering tools to navigate them)

One assignment for this week focuses on the idea of making space for my artistic self. Part of this represents an inner expansiveness of trust and self-acceptance that gives my artist self more permission and room to BE.

Each day I  have made time to expand and breathe, and then expand a little more – I can take more breath in than I realize. When I release a deep breath, I empty out and then let a little bit more air out – deepening the release of breath. On each inhale and exhale, I repeat, “I am worthy.” Synchronicity again that we practiced this in restorative yoga this week, another new and essential addition to my artistic  life that realigns my energy and releases tensions.

This is one new direction I’m exploring with my “pages” series, working with painted and gessoed and printed papers.  It seems to be working – I will continue to make the little pages you see, then compose and mount them – I’d like them to feel like they are barely attached and fluttering. Lots to still figure out.

I received a beautiful card from Suki, an inspiring poet, writer and artist, with Tibetan prayer flags on it that echo my inspiration for the fluttering pages and other works I am developing based on the idea of “writing in air.”

Another assignment Leslie gave our group this week was to create a ceremony or ritual acknowledging our authentic voice. I chose to write and say a daily focusing/ blessing for my ceremony for the week  (and am so  proud to say I did it every day):

 Welcome new day! I greet you with appreciation.

I bless and give thanks for my vibrant, active, healthy body.

I bless this home and its loving vibration.

I bless this beautiful world around me pulsing with life and hope and growth.

I bless my creative work and the soulful expression of my art.

I bless this day, trusting that it will bring stimulation, affection, nurture, interaction,play, joy, love and creative expression.

I know today and every day, the powerful creator that I am will find purpose and fulfillment, insight and clarity.

Everything in its perfect time.

Everything is unfolding.

It feels wonderful to say these words to begin the day.

Leslie suggested another assignment for me as well that I enjoyed doing, to take a brush and pan of water and make bold, gestural marks on my studio walls with abandon.  

It felt freeing, expansive, dancelike. I carried this openness to figure drawing class (my second) in a fellow artist’s studio in my building and the focus and concentration on the shapes and form and movements of the body were deeply satisfying. This class meets twice a month. My drawings improved enormously over my first night. I am settling in and feeling comfortable and deeply appreciative of the human form. Drawing feels powerful, comfortable, connected. It doesn’t matter what I produce, it is intensively satisfying to observe and explore the marks that capture gesture and form.

Full Moon, Why Didst Thee So Unsettle Me?!

 

From anxiety to insight and frustration to experimentation and ah-hah discoveries, this past week has been packed with irritations (I backed my car out of the garage on Friday, full moon day, whacked my driver’s side mirror hard enough to break the glass), fresh perspectives on self-trust and inner guidance (thanks to Leslie Avon Miller’s skillful coaching in the Finding Your Authentic Voice class, still in progress), erratic highs and lows (my work is exciting, my work is worm food) – not at all the typical pre-full moon week I love. Usually I’m yahooing and yee-hawing like a cowgirl riding at full gallop on strong currents of creative energy.

Not THIS full moon. Donna Watson from the wonderful blog Layers  recommended checking out Eric Maisel’s class on creative anxiety. Resources for handling the creative process gracefully are a must for artists, so I signed up for it.

Pages 11: Crumpled, 48” x 48”, mixed media on stretched canvas.

Meanwhile, studio work continued with some worthwhile sample making, experimentation for new works and doing some editing on  Pages 11: Crumpled, which is nearly complete.  

Acknowledging that I have strong and yet objective internal voice that can help evaluate works-in-progress is a major step for me and one that has been strengthened in great part by participating in Leslie Avon Miller’s “Finding Your Authentic Voice” class, which is generating many deep insights.

The full moon seemed to spur questions about new directions in my work, whether to deconstruct language imagery more, down to the gestural shapes and forms of letters, or to give the viewer something more tangible – perhaps take writings that inspire me, like Rilke’s Letters to a Young Poet, and imbue my surfaces with those lofty, inspiring ideas, not fully legible but able to be discerned in part.

I seem to be swaying back and forth, back and forth about whether to explore language imagery as a conveyor of ideas and meaning in a visual way or to pursue it as a series of beautiful gestural marks in their own right that don’t need to convey meaning to be appreciated. Or whether the two directions can juxtapose and work together.

Maybe this is the crux of the question that has been chafing inside me and heated up by intensity of full moon energy.

Are these two directions a dialogue, one that my work wants to investigate together,  a crossroads at which I need to make a choice or a new-way path, leading me  into something altogether unexpected and new?

Unsettling moon, yes, but one that is propelling me towards new realizations and new growth. By the time the full moon returns, may I have made great strides in developing these ideas into new works.

Sweet, Sweet Harmony

Yesterday and today I got to spend full, uninterrupted days in my studio. I can’t remember how long it’s been since I’ve had that luxury.

The energy in the space has felt “off” for at least a month. I was so excited to paint the charcoal wall and add the storage area, but suddenly the space didn’t generate the flow of creative energy that I have become accustomed to as soon as I walked in the door. The “gallery” feeling still hung in the air. Something was indeed amiss.

So first, I took down all the work in the room still hanging, except for my one “gallery corner”, and got it ready for storage.

Every  surface in the entire space was piled with “stuff” – sure doesn’t look inviting, does it?

So I put on calming, meditative music, took some deep, cleansing breaths and decided to slowly restore harmony to my kingdom. Gradually I could feel a shift inside, could seem to focus on where I want to store various items, what’s important to keep close at hand and what can be stored away in a container in the back. My mental confusion cleared and suddenly my studio felt the way it always has, a pleasure and delight to be in, a place of quiet focus, satisfying experimentation and making.

I’m revising and mounting several Pages pieces at the moment for my May exhibition, which now has a name: “Off the Page: Reinventing Alphabets”

The idea for this work is a crumpled page mounted on a stretched canvas frame.  The first view gives you a clearer view of the dimensionality. Yesterday I tacked it down to consider whether it needs any further adjusting. I’m letting it rest as it is for a few days and then will return and decide whether it will stay this way or get revised.

Here’s the front view of Pages 9: Crumpled, 48” x48”.

A third work is ready to be mounted on the frame that I applied composition gold leaf to yesterday and then aged today with acrylic paint.

The third piece is an ochre ground that will be rippled and attached to the canvas, so it too will be dimensional.

By the time I left today, the studio felt much more ordered and harmonious. It will be a pleasure to return and continue working there on Tuesday.

Insights and Ideas

Last year around this time I participated in  one of Leslie Avon Miller’s online coaching classes, called “Refresh Your Creative Practice” and amazing insights sprang from these sessions about my creative purpose and direction. A week ago I started this new year’s offering, “Finding Your Authentic Voice”,  already aware of how stimulating Leslie’s classes are and how they inspire my growth as an artist. This statement and image are from her blog:

Our first assignment  was to develop a metaphor for our authentic creative self through a partnered visualization with another member of the group. My metaphor is already inspiring  new ideas:

I am the alchemist who transforms life experience into artistic gold.

I am slowly easing back into studio work and productivity again after lots of organizational work and am revisiting some of the work that was in my exhibition last summer and revising its presentation.

Here is a 48” x 48” substrate with composition gold leaf applied and then worked back into to age with various acrylic paints. It’s absolutely lovely as it is and I may choose to create several more of these and complete them as mixed media/paintings.

I created the gold-leafed stretched canvas substrate with the idea of mounting this dimensional piece to it. I think it will work – won’t know until I finish hand tacking this to the canvas surface, which is a  time consuming task that I haven’t yet started. I’m also working on a third piece like this one but on an ochre ground with white and variegated gray letterforms and some hand stitching.

I meet tomorrow with three jurors and the director of Rochester Contemporary Art Center to coordinate the jurying for the Northeast Regional Juried Contemporary Fiber Exhibition, an idea that I initiated and have worked very hard to make happen for Surface Design Association members. With 100 entries and nearly 300 works to consider, the response has been gratifying and exciting.

By next week the organizational side of my life will quiet down for a bit and I’ll be able to work at least three full days in my studio again – looking forward to it.